Home Ownership, Google and Traveling for Work

The Joys of Homeownership

Living in far west Texas we don’t really suffer from inclement weather often.  I can’t remember the last time we had over a foot of snow or being below freezing.  I suppose that in the area where I live it’s considered perfect winter weather.  I say winter because in the summer we hit up to 105 degrees and that’s still a bit normal for us around here.  So, the weekend before last when my son noticed the paint near the ceiling in his room bubble, it made me fly into a panic.  The reason being that we haven’t had rain in almost three months and when I touched the small paint bubble it was just dry paint, nothing inside.  Then this past Sunday he called me into his room and he said that he thought there was water in the bubble this time.  Sure enough, we punctured it with a push pin and low and behold fucking water came gushing out.  Now I had to figure out where it was coming from since it hadn’t rained.  My youngest got up on the roof and discovered that the AC was leaking a bit and running down the roof, which doesn’t have a pitch because it’s almost flat, towards the back of the house right over my son’s room.  Then he noticed that there was a gash in the sealant coating covering the roof and that’s where the water was leaking into my son’s room.  Talk about being pissed as a scorpion without tequila, thinking this is just what I needed, an expense I can’t afford right now!!

I priced the cost of the materials I’m going to need to fix this and since I, as the honored homeowner have to do the work myself in order to save on labor, it’s going to cost me about $475.  Thank goodness I have three boys that are willing to help me get this done and make sure that no further leakage of said room occurs. 

I’m Not Google!

As weird as this may sound, I have one person in my life who, at times, I question their level of intelligence.  I’ve spoken about my dear, dear, airheaded friend Impostor #2 and how she would get on my nerves with her extreme naivete.  Well since I’ve hit menopause and my temper is shorter than usual and being triggered by things like stupid texts by my dear BFF asking me what the score of the current football game is.  Seriously, she sent me a text during one of the playoff games and since my Steelers didn’t make it to the playoffs this year (again) I told her I didn’t know.  Now this was on a Sunday and I was chillin’ on my couch watching That 90’s Show.  Trying to take in what I thought would be a complete waste of my time because nothing else was on, and was pleasantly surprised (by the show, not her.)  I get this random text from BFF asking if I’m watching the game, I say no and ask why?  She responds with she wanted to know the score of the game.  I’m sitting there thinking to myself, ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?!  Like has this stupid person not heard of Google?!  Oh, but wait, it doesn’t stop there, she’s sent me random texts asking if I know how many ounces in a cup, or how long does olive oil last if you don’t use it or who was the lead singer for the band .38 Special!!!  Just so you know I don’t respond to these stupid questions but that Sunday I wasn’t in the mood for one of her random texts and asked her, “Have you heard of Google?”  She responded with “Of course why are you asking?”  To which I replied “That’s where you can find the score to the game.”

Then, silence and I was glad because although she’s my very good friend, when I send her a text I almost never receive a reply in return.  And sometimes I’ve really needed her to respond to me.  We had an all out fight in October for my birthday because she didn’t go to work that day and I was busy as hell.  It was a Friday and we’d made plans to get together for my birthday to celebrate.  As we do every year for both our birthdays, it’s a tradition, we get the ingredients to make margaritas and order Pizza Hut.  Our Super Supreme with extra, extra jalapenos.   As I mentioned it was a Friday and I was busy as hell putting together some budget numbers for my boss and I kept getting texts from her throughout the day.  I would respond periodically and she said she’d pick up the pizza but wanted to know which Pizza Hut.  I responded with “the same one that we always order when you go to my house.”  Then I got super busy with a Teams meeting and working on another project my boss handed me.  So I didn’t respond, for three hours I didn’t and I kept getting text after annoying text.  During a bathroom break I replied with “Omg, FML the Pizza Hut on Transmountain for Christ sake!” And you know what happened next?  I get another stupid text asking “what’s FML?”

I literally screamed in the bathroom and I didn’t respond to her because I had two things to get out to my boss by 4:30 that day.  Do you think she stopped? No, no she fucking didn’t she kept texting and texting and texting.  My phone was pinging and pining until I finally had to silence it.   Five o’clock hit and I was finally on the road after a hectic Friday.  I had to stop and put gas in my car and I noticed I had twelve, count them twelve texts from her getting angry because I wasn’t texting her back.  I lost it and told her that I would see her at my house and that we’d talk there.  Then she texts me again asking what FML was, so I told her.  And when she got to my house she was angry and we had it out on my front porch.  I think she thought that I was going to back down because she’s very passive aggressive.  But I’m extremely aggressive-aggressive and I wasn’t having that shit on MY BIRTHDAY!  She was all telling me that she was just going to drop off the food and drinks and leave because she didn’t appreciate me and the FUCK MY LIFE comment.  I went off on her and told her that she’s so self-serving and when I need her to respond to my she never does.  And that just because she hadn’t gone to work that day didn’t mean that I wasn’t busy and I wasn’t about to drop everything that I was doing to be her personal thesaurus because she didn’t know how to use the internet to find out what the FUCK FML meant.

So, I said okay that it was fine with me if she left because I’m wasn’t in the mood to deal with her.  She looked at me and I was closing my front door in her face.  After I did she rang my door bell and as I opened up the door and stood there and she said “So are you ready to get your drink on?”  Needless to say, she fucked up my birthday because she kept referring to me not being Google and how she couldn’t send me a text because, God forbid I was pissed off.  I literally downed three margaritas in 20 minutes in  order to avoid killing the bitch, burring her body in my backyard and putting her car in my garage so no one would know where she last was.  And she’s still doing it, but I’m not engaging her stupidity because after all the shit she does to me, I still value her friendship.  Why? Who knows, maybe it’s because I only have three good friends left and I don’t feel like cultivating new ones.  Still her lack of knowledge of information services (the internet) amuses and bewilders me.  There should be a case study on her, while technically not a boomer, she sure as hell acts like one.

DC Then Onto………Hawaii

My boss let me know last week that there is a program meeting in Hawaii in September and that we’d be attending this meeting.  He’s all happy about this but me, I’m filled with dread.  Seeing as I’m barely making ends meet and these trips are very expensive even though we get our money reimbursed, I still don’t have the money for these business trips.  I suppose I should just take this as an opportunity to go somewhere I never dreamed I’d go and enjoy the splendor of going to Hawaii.  To be continued.

Until next time……this is the Huntress, saying…”Don’t be a Moth Around a Dim Yellow Bulb, Be a Moth to a Flame, Make it worth the Burn!”

Advertisement