Who Decides What’s Fashion? The Skinny and Overpriced Jean Dilemma.

This question came about because of a shopping excursion to buy a pair of jeans……

I will buy a lot of things on Amazon, for convenience of course, like shampoo, deodorant, laundry detergent because they come in bulk.  And sometimes one gets a really good deal on these items if you purchase them often.  Clothes however I will buy with caution, especially women’s clothes because one size does not mean it fits all.  Women’s clothing sizes will vary from one brand to another.  So a size 10 dress in one brand can be a size 8 in another, frustrating for sure.  But jeans are one thing I won’t buy on Amazon or anywhere online because sizes vary drastically by brand/manufacturer.  So during my lunch hour (and in order to get away from Baby Kermit’s constant, annoying bull frog, scratchy, loud, raspy throat clearing) I made my way to Kohl’s to find some black jeans for my upcoming trip to Nashville.

I walked in thinking I’d find the perfect black jean to go with my business casual wardrobe for this training/conference.  Then, as I made my way from one jean design/brand to another I didn’t even bother with the sizes.  Why?  Because I couldn’t get over the damned sticker shock prices that’s why.  They were advertising a “sale” half off or buy one get one half price, and I was like why the fuck would I buy one pair that probably costs as much as a goddamned car payment to get half off the other?! Seriously, the Levi’s women’s jeans were $59 and the other brands like Gloria Vanderbilt were $44, and nothing lower than $35.  Which is fucking ridiculous, their jeans not diamond encrusted bras, like Victoria’s Secret make for their annual fashion show, I mean come the fuck on!

Woman-Pulling-Hair-out-320x170

Then adding to my aggravation I go to Target which is seemingly more my price range, and then find that all the jeans, I MEAN ALL THE JEANS are low rise, skinny.  Why would stores like Target cater ONLY to millennial’s and carry just skinny low rise jeans?!?!  Has their marketing department not realized that the majority of the American population is overweight?  I’ve seen millennial’s (overweight millennial’s at that) try and fit their full sized, chubby asses into skinny jeans, it is NOT a pretty picture.  I’m not fat shaming here, I’d never do that but sometimes one has to wonder why a person would try and fit into something that clearly is two sizes too small?

Ugly butt crack jean meme
Seriously?!?

Anyway back to shopping, and as I’m trying to look through the sizes I hear some snarky young girl tell her mom that if she didn’t like any of the jeans at Target, she can go and get old mom jeans to wear.  Then this snarky little bitch laughs and walks away, she must have been 13 or 14 years old at the most.  I really wanted to just tell the little bitch, your headed down the same road, remember this.  But, meh who am I to say something like that?  Okay I have and I probably will again but I was still in sticker shock at the jeans I was looking at.

Mom jean gif
No, hell no and NO!

So why do older women like me seem to not be able to find jeans for us, sensible jeans, jeans that aren’t overpriced, low rise, skinny ass, can’t fit my muffin top, my ass is too big, my calves are literally COW jeans?!?!?!  Skinny jeans are my enemy, I have big calves, and skinny jeans don’t do it for me, they accentuate my big, fat lower legs which are already a menace to my ego and self-esteem, don’t even get me started on trying to find boots to wear in winter, ugh.  I can’t, for the life of me find a normal pair of dark blue or black denim, straight leg jeans that I can wear with boots or high heels for a business casual look.  I’ve seen memes online about acid washed jeans.  But you know what?  I’d give me right calve for a pair of blue, acid wash, button fly, straight leg Levi’s jeans right about now.

Acid wash denim meme

Don’t even get me started on the phenomena called………..JEGGINGS!  No support, no fashion sense, no way I could wear those to work, clothing disaster I couldn’t possibly pull off.   Again why would companies market jeggings to the majority of the population when the, according to NIDDK 40% of women are obese.  Jeggings are okay if your 5’5 and weigh 105 pounds, and even then I think jeggings are just wrong.  Besides, thanks to our “executive assistant” who wore leggings without underwear one day, leggings/jeggings were removed from our dress code.

Jeggings meme

But then again the definition of obese is subjective, I’ve lost 46 pounds, and because of my height (5’4) I’m considered obese even though I wear a size 8 jean.  So maybe the NIDDK needs to reassess what they consider obese according to height, because when did having curves become unattractive, like seriously……..but I digress.

Marilyn Monroe Picture
Marilyn was between a size 12-14 and she was beautiful.

I just want to find a pair of regular cut jeans, that are a perfect fit for me and that I won’t have to spend a fortune to buy.   If it were up to me, I’d banish the so called skinny jean from the face of the earth.  After all there were only “regular” jeans before some stupid woman decided to sew a regular pair of jeans into stupid skinny jeans because her bony ass didn’t look good in them, and made them a fad.  I’d also obliterate the so-called “mom jean”, those over-exaggerated lose fitting jeans with elastic waist bands as well.  Seriously who comes up with shit like this?

No More Skinny Jeans meme

Not to mention that now almost all stupid skinny jeans are sold…..TORN, ugh.  When I was a kid (don’t even go there with your fucking “Ok boomer” shit…..you know who you are) because I’m a Gen-Xer and grew up in the 1980’s not the goddamned 50’s.  We’d work hard to make new jeans comfy and worn.  And now people pay for torn jeans to wear as fashion? I must be living in the mirror dimension, seriously (if you don’t know what that is, watch Dr. Strange and then get back to me).  Right now I’m so frustrated with this entire jean situation, I’m going to go have a donut (or maybe two) and contemplate my jean conundrum.

Stay tuned for next week’s show where the Huntress will go into detail about how bras are devices of torture……

Onward and upward!!

The Huntress915

 

 

Published by thehuntress915

My life has been a lot like the movie Bridget Jones Diary (the Hispanic version) constant comedic struggles and life lessons learned by way of personal experience. I've survived divorce and online dating debacles, so tag along for the ride and lets laugh together.

27 thoughts on “Who Decides What’s Fashion? The Skinny and Overpriced Jean Dilemma.

  1. I have a thought, but being a man and having absolutely no fashion sense take it for what it’s worth. Why not buy men’s jeans? There are still several styles of fit (boot cut, straight cut, relaxed, etc.), and maybe with a little creative sewing they could be just the thing.
    When you talk about bras I will be totally clueless, though I have heard horror stories.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Your words echo my wife. “They’e all skinny. They’re all low rise. They’re all for skinny girls. Where are the jeans and clothes for women with a body?” And the prices were like, WTF? I haven’t bought jeans in about a year but I don’t remember the prices being this high when we were looking in December.

    I already heard about bra torture, many, many times.I’m thankful that Kramer and Frank Costanza’s idea for a bro or a man’s bra never caught on.

    Good luck. Cheers

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I wish I had your troubles, my friend. Lol. I get stuck with ugly ass mofo “mom jeans” because that’s all that fits and easy to get on. With mobility issues that’s a must for me. It’s not just jeans that piss me off, either. All the clothing for larger women is uglier than shit. I can’t stand how I have to dress because nothing fits my fat ass, thick thighed, elephant calved body and I can’t afford the shit that does fit. Ugh!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No my friend, your beautiful no matter what, remember that! I hate it too, how there aren’t any alternatives for bigger women. Why only cater to young, stick thin girls? I don’t get that shit, men don’t have that problem, at least I don’t think they do. Fashion is body and weight bias, and it sucks because we all want to feel good about ourselves without having to accept what society thinks is “beautiful.”

      Like

  4. Okay, Fellow Gen-Xer. I’m going to share my jeans secret with you.

    Three words… OLD NAVY ONLINE. I have been buying my jeans from Old Navy for about 10 years now. Since the closest one for me is no less than three hours at 70+mph away, I buy them online, which is even better because online sales happen frequently. I have to unsubscribe regularly because I’ll go nuts with the sales and coupons. Like right now, I checked and ladies’ pants are $15. I don’t need any pants, but there are some cute ones. UGH.

    Go to the store to find your fit and size, then order them online. BUT, first, be sure you sign up for the emailed coupons… I haven’t paid over $15 for a nice pair of ON jeans in years. The last time I stocked up, they had a sale where all jeans were $10. They totally have business-casual appropriate jeans, too.

    I LOATHE SKINNY JEANS, and I’m skinny. I’m 5’6″ and 114, and NOBODY needs to see my twiggy legs in a pair of jeggings or skinny jeans. Wide-leg trouser jean, Boot-cut or straight leg for me. Old Navy has a mid-rise, boot-cut curvy jean that is my current favorite – yes, I know I’m essentially curveless, but the curvy jean is more comfortable, especially for sitting. I hate labels and logos and Old Navy doesn’t have them on jeans.

    Also, you can read reviews on everything before you buy. My favorite dress slacks were from there, too, and all I had to do was add my size to my shopping cart and voila – shopping was done – and Krysta had black, gray, khaki and navy dress slacks in the mailbox 3-5 days later. And lovely white and black pairs of linen slacks for summer. And lots of black and white stripes, which I love too much. HA. Definitely something to look into if you haven’t already!

    Happy shopping, my dear!!!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Omg, Krysta you are a lifesaver! I never thought of Old Navy, simply because I’d gone to Kohl’s and Target and thought, I’m not going to find anything elsewhere so I dint even think about ON! Thanks so much, I’m going to go online and look first thing tomorrow! Especially since you mentioned slacks as well, woohoo! 😎

      Liked by 1 person

      1. YAYYYYYYY!!! I think there’s a 30% off everything in your cart today only, if I read correctly when I glanced at it. You can order online and return anything that doesn’t work to the store. I had to stop looking because I wanted to get every single pair of leopard print shoes and I really only need the pair of boots or ballet flats LOL Keep me posted! Most of my closet is ON, now that I look at it 😂

        Liked by 1 person

  5. I guess it’s a good thing I’m a guy, because I find even the small selection of clothing we have to be daunting. The sizing on men’s jeans isn’t much better, though… because even within the same brand, the sizes don’t always match up with what my fat gut says they should. Every pair of jeans I own has a 36 inch waist measurement… but literally every pair of them feels different on me. Some squeeze me like a vise, and some feel like they’re gonna drop to the floor at any moment. Given how many times I’ve ending up ripping the crotch out of regular men’s jeans just trying to bend down, I can’t believe women who actually wear those skinny jeans haven’t had to put up with seams blowing out on the daily!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m sorry I’m late to the party but there’s not a lot I can say except, damn, what is wrong with the people who design clothes? I may be a guy but I sympathize with your struggle. I’m shorter than average which makes it hard for me to find jeans that won’t extend beyond my feet when I pull them on, and when I do find a pair that’s just the right length they have something like a 72-inch waist and I spend the rest of the day wondering if there’s actually someone who wears jeans that size.
    What I can help with, though, is the trip to Nashville, assuming it’s the one in Tennessee. It’s kinda my town and I hope you have a good time here. One thing you might like is the Parthenon and the statue of Athena. You know that under that toga she’s a gal who can really rock a good pair of jeans.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thank you Christopher, I’ll be there next week for a conference at the downtown Double Tree. I think that the Parthenon sounds like someplace I might visit. And you know Athena can rock can rock anything she wears. 😎

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I was actually about to say Old Navy myself then I read the comment above. That or The Gap–they have a lot of very comfortable styles! I’m fairly thin but I don’t have much of a waist or hips, and I HATE skinny jeans–they always feel like they’re falling off my ass!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I actually found some awesome jeans at Old Navy, I bought four pairs because they had a sale and I used a coupon too! I’m so thankful for Krysta who suggested it. I was really ready to give up, because seriously, skinny jeans, come on! As I mentioned if you have cows not calves skinny jeans will not work for me, ugh. Don’t even get me started on the low rise thing, I mean we all don’t have flat, toned abs, ugh….🤨🙄🤔

      Liked by 1 person

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