What Part of Leave Me Alone Don’t You Understand?

Let me start by saying that today, I’m in an unbelievably bad mood, and there’s no telling why.  It began when I got to work, as I walked in somehow I felt a kind of negativity enveloping me.  Go figure, I should either go with it or try to “be nice.”  But I think I’m going to go with it……..it feels like a four cup of coffee morning.

Ain’t that the truth……

Now that I’ve written about the new annoying coworker, I have a ton of new material to write about regarding annoying Baby Kermit and her child like mentality and way of talking.  So here’s another revelation that this person is a couple of cans short of a six pack.

Our entire office decided it would be “fun” to have a Halloween door decorating contest, by group.  And by this I mean my department has to collectively decorate one door in a decided theme.  So since I’m not at all crafty in the least, I mean that I just recently discovered hem tape thanks to my buddy over at mydangblog so I wouldn’t have to hand sew anything anymore.  Being seasonally “crafty” and not crafty like plotting someones demise because that I can do.  Just not decoration kind of crafty.

We all had a luncheon last week and tossed around some ideas about what the door theme should be and we all decided on Movie Theme Monsters.  We are also going to tie that into some of our job duties.  Of course my big mouth chose Jaws, and how each and every faculty member just tears to shreds the budgets we work on.  So we all chose our movie monsters and what does annoying Baby Kermit do?  She picks………..La Muerte, death by compliance!  She sent this out by email and I responded with “How is this tied into our movie theme? Is there a movie about La Muerte that I didn’t hear about?”

The backlash quickly began, I got emails from my other coworkers saying that it’s okay that she’s new and that there is a movie with that name (in Spanish) and that it ties into the theme.   Okay I may be in a bad mood today I mean more than usual and I didn’t take too kindly to my existing coworkers defending the newby (the corrupt newby that is, remember she jumped ship from that sinking, federally investigated place before the feds actually began their investigation?) Yes I’m in an extremely bad mood this morning, I felt it as soon as I walked in the door.  And now Thing 1 has chosen Ursula from the Little Mermaid, I’m like is this a movie monster theme door decoration or a childlike play on monsters?!?!  But I digress….ugh.

Like totally….leave me the fuck alone….

Because it’s my supervisors birthday and the person that picked her name to decorate her office door and pass around the birthday card forgot….AGAIN!  I have a stash of birthday cards and door decorations in my desk.  Yes I’m OCD that way, so since I’m here at about 5 mins to seven every day I decorated my supervisors door and left the birthday card on the persons desk, you know the one who forgot to do all this shit.  Then immediately I thought to myself, why the fuck did I do this?  I shouldn’t have, that way my part time coworker “Thing 1” would feel stupid for forgetting and maybe she’d finally do what she was supposed to.

But my supervisor is awesome, she doesn’t deserve to be forgotten on her birthday so I left the decorations up.  But I did put a sticky note inside the card directed at Thing 1 saying….”Next year if you forget about the person you chose for the b-day celebration I’m not covering for you.  You need to put it in your Outlook to remind you, REMEMBER THAT!”  She came into my office after she’d gotten everyone else to sign the card and began to babble, that she was sorry and that she did really forget and blah, blah, blah.  I was sipping my coffee and looking at her over my coffee cup with that, “you’re so stupid and I know you know it” look.

Baby Kermit’s voice is so unbearably annoying that I now have to use my Beat earbuds just to drown out her fucking voice because I can hear her all the way across the hall with my door closed!!!   I do this also because my director’s office is four doors down from mine and Baby Kermit is always in there….I mean ALWAYS!  I know I sound like a complete and total killjoy and that I’m intolerant of my new coworker.  But I can’t shake this feeling that she was hired on purpose to avoid going through that investigation that’s currently looming over her previous place of employment.  Let’s just say it’s a gut feeling.  I need to close my door, have another couple cups of coffee and listen to some Christopher Cross, maybe some “Sailing” might help me chill out right now.

On the other hand some Hole, Celebrity Skin might do the trick.  Yep meh bitch Courtney has got my back!

“I’m all I want to be, a walking study in demonology…….yeah!”

Until next time remember, chin up, soldier on and watch your back!

The Huntress 915